Sometimes, we wish relationships had a preview button, however, they don’t. So, the best solution is to know what we want and what we don’t want. Experience helps us learn what we can accept and what we can’t. At first, it may seem as if these behaviors and actions are changeable, however, this is not always the case. An important aspect is the acknowledgment by the person, the root of the action, that is, fear and the dirt of unawareness.
If there is a man reading this article, you are probably curious and you want to understand what a woman looks for in a man. Moreover, by doing this, you indicate that you are ready to work on yourself if necessary. Learning to love yourself as you are, fully exposing your heart and being vulnerable is the best option. In this way, there is power inside of you to become the man that sits hidden somewhere deep inside. Ladies, if you recognize your partners in some of these situations, you might be dating a boy, not a real man. If this is true, you need to let him go so that he can grow. It is important that you don’t waste your time with someone who wastes their own time!
Are you the one who always involves him in every plan, thought, action, and decision? Moreover, you have introduced him to your family and friends, and he is in every part of your life, however, he rarely invites you into his life in the way you do. This may indicate that the person you are dating is unwilling to share his life with you. This person is a withholder, however, love never withholds!
WATING UNTIL THE LAST MOMENT TO COMMIT TO A PLAN
If your partner is unable to commit to an event or a plan one week ahead, it might mean that he is not willing to commit to a lifetime with you neither. Never be fooled by the claims that the essence of life is to live for the moment because nobody knows what the next hour, day, or week holds. On the contrary, real men make plans while cherishing the present moment.
YOU HAVE NEVER BEEN ON AN ACTUAL DATE
Are you and your partner just hanging out and deciding where to go at the last moment? At times, this is okay; however, romance should always prevail. A man needs to have the desire to woo you. This doesn’t mean that the date should be expensive and fancy; it only needs to be thoughtful and planned with love and dedication. Unfortunately, if your partner has never planned a special day or night to surprise you, you have never been on a real date. Therefore, you should find a gentleman who wouldn’t have it any other way. Such men make the best husbands and fathers.
FOREPLAY: WHAT IS THAT?!
There are some men who think that a quickie sex is the way to go. However, this is not always the case. The man you are with needs to be connected to its masculinity. He should possess the strength and desire to nurture his woman, keep her close, and protect her. Intimacy is physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual. When one or more of these aspects are absent, the intimacy is unsuccessful.
NO CLOSE FRIENDS
If he doesn’t have at least one or two close friends, this is serious warning sign. If your partner has only acquaintances with whom he only talks small talk, you need pay attention to their interactions. Is there hugging when they say hello and goodbye? Do they talk about topics other than girls, cars, sports, money? His behavior with the people around him points out how he will behave with you.
HE DOESN’T WANT TO INTRODUCE YOU TO HIS FAMILY
Meeting your partner’s family is important aspect of every relationship. His behavior in front of his parents discovers a lot about his foundation.
It is acceptable to have an unwashed dish or two in the sink or few shirts on the bed. However, when his clothes are no longer in the closet but everywhere in the room, when you see food packages all around the house or under the couch, you may end up as his maid if you end up living together one day. Having a lifetime partner should make your life cleaner, not dirtier. The inability to maintain a clean home indicates that he has no control over his mind. If you think that you can help him change his ways, you are in the wrong, because he needs to resolve this issue on his own, thus, take control of his mind.
LEAVING DURING AN ARGUMENT
If your partner leaves when you are trying to explain yourself in an argument, it means that he doesn’t know how to cope with such situations and lets his ego take over. True love is present all the time and every fight needs to be surpassed by both partners. Listening to one another is crucial aspect in every relationship. Additionally, having someone who runs away from arguments all the time is not the person you want to rely on in hard times.
TROUBLE SAYING ‘I LOVE YOU’
If he is unable to express his love for you, he doesn’t love himself either. Hence, no one should be in a relationship with a person who doesn’t love themselves because this is torture, not love.
BLAMES OTHERS FOR HIS SITUATION
Does your partner blame everyone else for his outcomes in life? If he speaks negatively of his ex partners and blames them for the unsuccessfulness of their relationship, he can also do the same to you. An immature and irresponsible person is unable to accept responsibility for his actions and words. On the other hand, one needs to be mature and aware to be able to say they are sorry and that they forgive others. If he blames you for every problem in your relationship, he enjoys being perceived as the victim. However, acting as a victim is rather cowardly because a mature man would apologize and accept apology. A relationship should never be a competition.
If your partner tends to roll his eyes, avoid eye contact, and smirk when you share your feelings, it means that he is running away from himself and you, emotionally. If he treats you with disrespect, he is not comfortable in his own skin and he is incapable of holding a loving safe space for you or your relationship.
EXAGGERATOR, OMITTER, AND LIAR
No matter how white the lie, he is being dishonest and love holds no place for dishonesty.
DOESN’T LIKE TO WORK AND CAN’T HOLD A JOB
One of the most honorable and noble things is a person who works and tries hard. No matter whether you collect garbage or work at a grocery store, your hard work is a noble act. Never be a starving artist and work to live because this is the reality of life. However, this doesn’t mean that a person should give up their passions and dreams altogether, but if your partner is unable to pay his rent or food, his passion is automatically homeless and doomed to fail. Instead, he should find a job that can help him live your purpose. Having a partner who is unable to hold a work position for a longer period of time indicates lack of commitment, ambition, and discipline. Having money should not be about the money, but about the principle.
For example, if he has bought and sold more cars than the years you are together, he is a hustler and avoids real work. He lacks loyalty and perseverance. If he tends to buy and sell things in a short period of time, he can easily do the same with you: replace you for a newer model!
HE DISLIKES CHILDREN
A man’s behavior around children indicates his potential father skills. Therefore, pay attention.
DR JEKYLL AND MR HYDE SYNDROME
If you partner has different personas, one when he is with you and another one when he is around other people, he might be using you. Mood swings at times are a normal thing; however, consistently changing your personality is not a good thing.
HIS WORDS DON’T MATCH HIS ACTIONS
If your partner tells you that he loves you via texts and claims to be your biggest fan and supporter means nothing if he is not with you in your moments of need. A man who really supports you will always be there for you without you even asking. At the end of the day, we all deserve someone who believes in us more than we believe in ourselves.
CRYING MORE THAN LAUGHING
If he doesn’t make you smile, both with your face and heart, and if he is not smiling back at you, it may be the time for you to move on.